Typewriter!

M and A went shopping yesterday. They were supposed to by groceries. But instead, they went to a Goodwill and bought an Adler satellite 2001 electric typewriter. A is in heaven and I'm finding that I have to step away from the typewriter whenever A presses five keys at once and the mechanism jams.

In related news, we had old oatmeal for breakfast.

Connectivity

In a rare moment of connectivity, we're able to send a photo from the laptop.  A says HI to J and Bubba, and wants to know how the trebuchet is.

Sticks on the Merry-Go-Round

Scene: The Playground. A is eating a stick on a kid-pushed merry-go-round. J is going parental.

J (walking over to m-g-r): "A, take that stick out of your mouth."

A looks at J as the m-g-r revolves.

J: "You know what I say about sticks in your mouth..."

A (takes stick out of mouth): "You can't come on [the m-g-r]. It's already started." (Translation: I can do whatever I want and I don't have to listen to you as long as this playground equipment is in motion.]

THWAMMM! (sound of 180 pound grown-up leaping onto metal m-g-r)

J (crouching beside A on the still-rotating m-g-r. Holds out hand). "Give me the stick."

A (surprised look on his face, kind of a cross between 'oops,' and 'dad's on the m-g-r; can he *do* that?'. Hands over the stick.

J: "Thank you." (Backward leaps off of m-g-r. Walks away.) (To himself) "Heh. Kid, you picked the wrong dad to try that trick on." (M is the dad who barfs just looking at the m-g-r.)

Well, I Tried.

Scene a forced march to burn off excess energy late morning perambulation through the neighborhood. The fog is burning away, and the sunlight is on its way to being bright.

A (singing at the top of his lungs to a tune which is a hybrid of "Just You Wait Henry Higgins", "Get Me to the Church on Time" and several Christmas carols): "SO YOU'LL BE MEAN / AND I'LL WALLOP YOU / AND THEN I'LL GET A CANNON / AND I'LL TAKE YOU TO THE CHURCH / AND LOCK YOU UP --"

J (singing intently, but softly): "And you'll be really nice, / and I'll play with you, / and we'll share our toys together / and we'll have a great time and --"

A (indignant): "No, no, NO. J! Be quiet! You're messing up my song!"

J: "But I'd like to sing about nice things."

A: "I'm singing about mean things. (sings twice as loudly as before) "SO I'LL BE REALLY MAD / AND I'LL BLOW UP YOUR HOUSE / AND I WON'T CARE AT ALL AS IT BURNS TO THE GROUND / HARK THE HERALD ANGELS SING / GLORY TO THE NEWBORN KING . . . "

September Photos

SeptPhotos09

September Utterances

Scene: The Preschool. J has just entered to pick up A.

A (running to J): "J! J! Today I learned to use my words and not hit people with a shovel!"

(pause to imagine Tweety/Sylvester shovel source material)

Teacher (responding to J's stricken look): "We had a great day."

---

Scene: Early morning at home. M is packing the car for an early-morning hike. A is being an over-energetic, rude, and slightly destructive pain in the rear.


J: "C'mon. Put on your shoes. Come with me."

(the shodding commenced, they head outside.)

J (sitting down on a patio chair): "Do you think you can run around the cherry tree six times?"

A (runs across backyard to tree): "Let's see... one... two... [...] ...six!"

J: "Do you think you could do seven?"

A: "I'm going to do all the numbers!" (jump-skips around tree)

J (leaning back in chair): "OK. I'll count."

(time passes)

J: "Twenty six..."

A (panting): "I'm getting tired. How many numbers are there after twenty-six?"

J (carefully not smiling): "Ooh. There's a few -- keep running!"

A (more determined): "I'm going to do them all."

J: "Do you think you can do thirty?"

(more time passes, A is sort of walk-hopping)

J: "Wow, buddy! You made it to forty! That's great!"

A (walking away from tree): "I (pant) think I (pant) need some water..."

He Asked For It.

Monday night, A asked for a buzz cut. I said that maybe we would later in the week.




Tuesday morning, A asked for a buzz cut.




"Are you sure?" I asked. "Once I cut them off, I can't put them back on." I took down Portable Stonehenge. "So, Bud, we're almost at the equinox here." I put my finger at the Ides of Autumn. "And Halloween is here, and Christmas is here." I moved my finger around the path of the sun. "And Groundhog Day is here, and the Spring Equinox is here. Your curls probably won't come back until Easter or so. Are you sure you want me to buzz cut your hair?"

"Yeah," he said. "What's Groundhog Day?"

After I explained how the Groundhog's Shadow worked... I got out my electric clippers and buzzed the golden curly locks away.

"There's going to be women crying all over the country," M said when A greeted him at the door later that afternoon.