No Stickers. Ever.

I left A to his own devices for a moment.

He announced that he had put stickers all over the house. Since 1) I didn't particularly want the house branded with various cartoon characters and 2) the adhesive wasn't the best thing for various surfaces, we took them off.

Trying my best to keep my voice calm and level, I asked him, "Buddy, why'd you put stickers all over the house?"

"Because I wanted to make the house talk."

"Uh," I said, taken aback, "how were you going to do that?"

"I'd put the stickers up and then wave my wand."

"And then what?" I asked, wondering where this cartoon-inspired opening of the mouth ritual was going to go.

He continued. "Then I'd take a wire and put one end into headphones and the other end into the wall."

"So, um, where are you going to get the wire?"

"I'm going to make a hole in the ceiling, and then I'll put a poisonous snake into it."

Since this procedure seemed to increase the number of holes in the house I said, "Wow. You've got a good imagination."

Then we peeled each sticker off and put them on his closet (the designated sticker area).